Absent Minded Professor: tragedy behind the moniker

My what a day I have had! At least, I think it was today… and I’m pretty sure it was me…

This morning, I ran across the street to buy some milk for my coffee. The total was $1.17, so I handed the cashier a five, three nickels and two pennies. Then, somehow thinking that since the pennies were exact, I would receive no change, I thanked her and started to walk away. The lovely woman said, “Hey! Lady! You gave me a five!” I replied by looking back at her while continuing to walk and said “huh?” My mouth was hanging open at this point, and I imagine I resembled a dairy cow: curious, brainless and drooly. She looked at me and did one of those sassy little head jiggles from side to side, as if to say “oh no you di-uhnt!” Instead, she said “You. Gave. Me. A. Five.” Having worked counter positions in the past, I knew she was thinking “How come I’m sitting here earning $5.70 an hour, and they pay wombats like her to educate our best and brightest? our hope for a better future?” I closed my mouth and sheepishly collected my change.

But wait! The brain damage is worse than you think.

This afternoon, I hastily packed today for an overnight trip to a research station. Here are the items I included:

1 toothbrush and floss
1 tube of toothpaste
1 comb and assorted shower things
the latest Harry Potter book
1 iPod, plus charger
Law & Order Season 4 DVDs
laptop
Papers to grade
gloves
socks
clean underpants


That’s it folks. You may ask yourself where are her pajamas? Where is her change of clothes for the next day? Where is her pillow (my glorious destination supplies no linens, and thank goodness I forgot to take the sheets home last time I was there!)?

What does it say about me that I remember 3 kinds of entertainment, and forget my clothes? No, don’t tell me… I’ll probably forget.